when it's cold outside, have a cup of coffee and a warm conversation.

19 inches. Stop. Take a moment and think about it. Now imagine 19 inches of snow. Sick, right? But, this is the city that never sleeps. So, you get up, put on all the layers and complete the look with a good sturdy pair of snow boots (thanks mom and dad!) and you jump on the subway. You stop for food and drink and then finally end up in the rehearsal room. (Or somewhere else, but this is my blog, so rehearsal room is where you'll end.)

Here's what's nice about working with an Equity company, you get normal break times. YAY! So, dinner break rolls around and I get a great chance to go get some coffee and a bagel with the great Katie! (Here comes the shameless plug) Katie is the choreographer for Blood Wedding and The Dybbuk in Marvell Rep's Inaugural season. She is someone I have worked with before and not only is she great dancer/choreographer, she is a fantastic person!

So, over dinner we go to Starbucks and sit down to enjoy some coffee and catch up since the last time we saw each other. We talked about life in NYC, friends, family, theatre, auditioning, and the list goes on. It was so wonderful. The thing is though, that I hadn't had caffeine in almost two week, so the coffee just hit me. Before I knew it, I was just talking and spilling my guts about all the above mentioned things. How I don't know if waiting to become Equity is the right thing? How my sisters got married in September. What a great support system my three best friends are. And on and on and on.

Now, the conversation wasn't one sided at all. Katie told me a lot of things as well. It was just a wonderful conversation. Time just flew by. As it was time to go back to rehearsal, we gathered our things and braced ourselves for the cold. The most amazing thing though.... the conversation just continued and I never once noticed cold air or the snow surrounding me.

That's the cure. I can get so down and just "blah" when winter hits (especially 19 inches of winter white), but when it's cold outside, have a cup of coffee and a warm conversation. <3

From one window to the next

This morning (Sunday, January 16), while mom and dad went to pick up Jade and Dmitry from the hotel and everyone else was still asleep at the house, I stood by the sink getting myself a glass of water. While standing there, I looked out the window that overlooks our back yard. I could see the woods to the right, farmland to the left and the far back past the yard, and the garden at the bottom of the hill. I could also see the tree that stands just to the left of the window. It was a beautiful morning. The snow was almost completely melted away and you could see the slightest trace of where the family and I went sledding a few days back. There were 3 beautiful blue birds jumping from the tree to ground gathering stuff for their homes and I couldn't help but smile. That was the exact same thing I was doing - gathering stuff for my new home.

It really got me thinking about Jasper and New York. How different the two are in almost every way imaginable.  I could look out at my back yard in the country and recall almost every memory spent out there. It's my home. The place I grew up, with a warm bed and a home cooked meal, with my family that I love so much. Now I'm in New York and the view is much different. There is no back yard, or garden, or family, or memories. It's cold and scary and new. But exciting. 

I can't say I want to grow up and be an adult. Honestly, who does? Being an adult is hard work and being a child is easy. Growing up though, is a must. And if I must, then I am going to try and make it the best I can. So, I have to learn how to make home cooked meals, I'll have to make new memories, and though I won't really have a back yard of my own or a garden like my dad's, I'll have my own home and my own warm bed and my own bills, and career, heck, I may even get my own library card. 

So, what's the point of looking from one window to the next? Well, like growing up, it's a must. While one window may hold a view that is beautiful, comfortable, and familiar, you never know what view is in the other. And while at first that new view seems cold and scary, if you take the time to look out carefully, you just may find something just as beautiful, exciting, and worth your time <3

Goodbye 2010, Hello 2011

So, I blogged (if 5 entries count as blogging) while in the UK and I really enjoyed it, but things got...hmm... complicated and I stopped because of other things going on in my life. However, I enjoy journaling and this is a good way to do it without killing trees! I'm not writing this for others (sorry) but if you want to read along as I blog, feel free. It is public after all.

I don't know how often I'll write, I don't know what I'll write about, heck I don't even know if anything I write will make sense, but write I will (when I feel like it). 

I've been wanting to write about 2010 for a couple of weeks now and just haven't gotten around to it. What better time to write than the present. 

So, here is 2010 in a short format....

*2010 NEW YEAR: The year started off beautifully... No really it did, in beautiful, sunny San Diego. It's the last family trip that the Ruckriegel's had before they started marrying off. We figured it would happen, but not like it did... but that is further in the year. This is January. So, I started the year in San Diego with my family and if you ask me, it's the only way to spend the start of a year. (With your family, not necessarily in San Diego.) 

*THEATRE: The year was filled with tons of theatre, naturally. The first production of the New Year was Hamlet and I played Queen Gertrude. Challenge? You have no idea. But that is the whole point of going to school, is it not? Starting in January was the prep for the 2010 summer season of New Harmony Theatre. I traveled with Lenny and Amy again to NYC in February to run auditions. Of course it was a blast. Casting 3 outstanding shows and seeing countless numbers of truly talented people. Seriously, one of the BEST jobs I've ever had! I was asked to participate in the Off-Broadway staged reading of Before the Rain. I read staged directions and assistant directed under Lenny Leibowitz. I love management and casting, but of course I most passionate about performing, which is a huge chunk of what I did for NHT this summer. I played Maria in School for Scandal, I read Hilda (side note: I *LOVE* this character) in The Lady from the Sea, I read a couple different parts in The Dybbuk, and I directed and read for Mabel in the original musical, Before the Rain. Aside from performing, I  was co-Artistic Director for the Second Staged Reading Series through NHT and assistant directed Ain't Misbehavin'. Definitely an interesting year of theatre, but an awesome one!

*TRAVEL: Hmmm...... ok, San Diego to ring in the New Year. New York City in February for NHT auditions. New York City in May for an Off-Broadway staged reading of Before the Rain. Chester, England for school. Mini-travels while in England: Northern Wales, London, Venice, Rome, Paris, Berlin, Liverpool, Manchester. Whew... that's crazy. 

*(NEW) FRIENDS & (NEW) FAMILY: So, this summer the Russians invaded. Well, only 3 of them. Dmitry, Alex, and Dima. Three came to the states and only one went home. Leave it up to the Ruckriegels to keep 2 Russians. Seriously though, love these guys. I miss Dima all the time and wish that he wasn't half way around the world. But I really believe that our paths will cross again. As for Alex and Dmitry, I've always wanted brothers and I knew I would get them when my sisters got married, but I didn't think they would all get hitched so fast, but that is life. So, as of September I had two new brothers-in-law (oh, and I've decided that saying brother-in-law is too much and quite stupid, so I will forever refer to them as my brothers). Then (though, this was expected) Camille got engaged to James *FINALLY*. So now it looks, like three brothers for Jasmine, although James won't legally be one until the end of 2011. I can't forget about my lovelies in England, no can I? Kortnei (my awesome roommate, who is totally bad-ass), Laura (my crazy neighbor who also loves theatre and was my travel buddy), and of course Luis (Mr. Puerto Rico himself and my stalker... I know *ABSURD* right [sorry, inside joke] ). I met so many people while abroad and I will always hold a special place in my heart for them, especially Kortnei, Laura, and Luis.

Wait, this is getting awfully long.... so let's end with ringing in the New Year 2011... with family and friends, naturally. All-in-all, 2010 was a pretty good year. Great family, great friends, great theatre, and great travels. It's hard to get it all with this pitiful entry, but you try blogging about an entire year in one post. 

But it's a new year with new days. What does 2011 hold for me. Well, it holds a life in NYC with two jobs, including one with Marvell Repertory Theatre (Here's my plug.... CHECK IT OUT! It is NYC only true rotating rep company and I know for a fact that the company is awesome!). It holds 3 weddings.... Now, that is crazy, but crazy in a beautiful way. 

It also holds happiness. I can feel it. I'm not perfect. Actually, no where near it. But I try to continue to learn and grow. I often learn small things, but once in while I learn something huge. That's what happened in 2010, I learned something huge. I can be happy. Not just, "hey, yeah, I'm cool. I'm happy. Things are good.", but really really happy. Happy as in where you are, who you're with, what you're doing and constantly pursuing that happiness. 

In 2010, I learned that I can be truly happy. So, in 2011, I will be. That's it, that's my resolution. To constantly pursue happiness and to truly be happy. 

"If you want to be happy, be." - Leo Tolstoy